Breaking the Stigma: How therapy for moms can help with anxiety and parental burnout

Anxiety is a normal human emotion that everyone will experience to a degree at some point in their life. At the fundamental level, anxiety is a stress response, and much like a survival instinct, it continues to evolve for the purpose of keeping us safe by alerting us to potential dangers– real or perceived. While occasional or mild levels of anxiety are normal and even helpful, chronic or severe anxiety may feel paralyzing and can have lasting consequences on individual and relational well-being.

Mothers and anxiety

It's estimated that women are around twice more likely to be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder than men, and since motherhood in particular can trigger a whole slew of anxiety-inducing experiences, mothers are among the highest at risk for experiencing anxiety. 

Mothers juggle a diverse load of responsibilities which can make them more susceptible to developing symptoms of anxiety. In addition to individual life responsibilities, Mothers have the added pressures of raising children, managing a household, and juggling work, and many mothers struggle with feeling overwhelmed and burnt out. In fact, studies have been done reporting that mothers were way more likely to experience parental burnout than fathers, and they were also more likely to report feeling stressed and anxious. 

When it’s time to seek help

Motherhood has a way of depleting energy levels and forcing women to face their anxieties, yet many mothers suffer in silence due to the stigma surrounding mental health and motherhood. Sadly, mothers may feel a sense of shame or even embarrassment admitting they’re struggling under the demands of motherhood. Consequently, fear of being judged by others can and unfortunately does become a barrier to Mother’s seeking therapy and other forms of support. 

Breaking down barriers

I’m a big believer that stigmas are upheld by misinformation, fear and/or lies, and the best way to abolish these stigmas is to speak the truth. The truth is that Mothers coping with anxiety is not an abnormality. It’s a reality. The fantasy of a perfect work-life balance with everyone feeling, behaving, and looking their best all the time is unreal, unattainable, and unhealthy. Finding balance is a balancing act, and if you’re struggling to keep everything balanced, that doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you normal, and human! 

It really does take a village 

Parenting is hard. It often takes some outside support, like anxiety therapy. If you are coping with anxiety, you are not alone. Over the course of three decades, I’ve been providing professional guidance and therapeutic support to families and mothers. I’ve seen firsthand how when mothers don’t receive the support they need and deserve, neither does the family. However, I’ve also seen the reverse. When mothers are properly supported, the trickle-down effect is felt by the rest of the family.

Anxiety therapy for mothers can be a wonderful resource and a great way to provide mothers with the support they need to break free from anxiety. 

5 Ways therapy can help mothers coping with anxiety

1. Therapy is a very useful resource. Especially for mom’s who may not have access to a strong support system, having an empathetic and trained professional provide you with supportive guidance and mindful parenting techniques can make a huge difference.
2. Therapy is a learning opportunity. The knowledge and training you can receive in therapy provide you with actionable coping techniques and parenting tools to manage your anxiety. From mindfulness practices to parenting support, you will learn how to emotionally regulate your anxiety as a mother. If you're parenting a child with anxiety, I can also help you with that!
3. Therapy is part of a well-rounded self-care ritual. Self-care is easier to talk about than actually do, especially for busy mothers, and having a designated, routine time to focus on your psychological well-being can help ensure you get the time you need to process the complexities of motherhood.
4. Therapy provides emotional support. I know from decades of experience that receiving adequate emotional support is crucial for managing anxiety, and having a trained professional compassionately support you can be extremely helpful.
5. Therapy offers a safe space for self-exploration and reflection on how you are taking care of yourself while balancing everything else. Motherhood brings about every possible feeling. The good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, the sweet, the terrifying… Feeling isolated and alone is one of the lies anxiety tries to tell mothers, and it’s simply not true. From first-time mothers coping with postpartum mood and anxiety disorders, to mother-wound triggers, to seasoned mothers coping with burnout anxiety and depression to adoptive moms wondering if they made the right decision, I’ve seen it all. Trust me, you’re not alone in what you are experiencing.

Let’s figure this out and address your concerns together.

Often times, mom’s spend a lot of time worrying about whether they should start or resume therapy when they are feeling as though anxiety is taking over their lives. These worries are common and may include stress related to:

1. Cost – How do I justify the expense? I hear this concern a lot, and I get it. I really do. But if you twisted your ankle badly and had trouble walking, you would likely seek medical care. Otherwise, it could get worse and affect your ability to walk properly, right? Well, emotional health is similar. Anxiety has a crippling affect, and if it’s left unattended, it could get much worse and effect your mental, physical, and relational health in more serious ways. In many ways, therapy is more of an investment in you and your family’s well-being, and I think it’s worth it.
2. Time commitment – How do I find the time? Participating in therapy doesn’t have to be long-term. Even just a few months (or even weeks, in some cases) can help you. Plus, with the convenience of virtual visits, therapy is more accessible than ever. 
3. Fear of being vulnerable – I’m afraid to open up. Finding a therapist you trust and feel comfortable opening up to is crucial. It absolutely has to be a good fit. Sometimes, you just won’t know if it’s a good fit until you meet with them, but you can set yourself up for success by asking friends or someone you trust for recommendations, reading online reviews, checking out their websites, reading their blogs, etc. 
4. Fear of being judged – What will people think? It takes courage to ask for help, and taking the time and making the investment to improve your emotional health and parenting skills can not only help you, but it can also set a strong example for your children. That being said, your therapy experience can be as private as you’d like. No one is going to know unless you choose to tell them or give me permission to share information. 
   
   

Embrace life fearlessly!

You don’t need to be responsible for your well-being all by yourself. If you are struggling with coping with anxiety, please contact a therapist today. Parent counselorsunderstand the magic and sometimes mayhem of motherhood. 

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